The Blind Side

I have had a clear view of where my life was heading ever since I filed for divorce. The court hearings and preparations for the same made things get clearer with each passing day. In the last few days I faced the worst and was quite sure that things couldn’t get any worse.

What I am experiencing now is nowhere close to what I had imagined. I want to feel happy, relaxed, peaceful, content, grinning at my victory, proud of my farsightedness and many other positive notes. But reality is far from these.

I am feeling as if someone has punched me hard in my belly, creating a void that seems to have sucked out all vision, peace and reasoning out of me. I am feeling weak, dizzy, hurt, burnt and irritated despite the fact that this moment was long anticipated.

Slowly and gradually as the reality of being divorced is sinking into me, I am feeling a sense of strange loneliness grip me strongly. If I were to think logically, I have many people in my life and the one who has been legally detached from me hasn’t been around from a long time, but such are the games mind plays.

Though legally it is the end of all hurt, anguish and pain but, there are still countless things to be set in order. There is still a long way before the court’s decision can be put into action due to involvement of institutions and people in two different countries that are continents apart.

But still the major battle is won and the rest is just a matter of time.

When I try to look at it with a clear head, the stark reality is, that the end of my marriage has now been written in black and white, though it had already ended long back. Just an official declaration of a fact known to me from a long time.

The song on my mind:Zindagi ki yehi reet hai ~ Mr. India

About these ads

45 thoughts on “The Blind Side

  1. Heartiest congratulations ME!! I cant tell you how happy I was when I read that the court proceedings are over and you have got what you wanted. I am sure you will feel back to you old happy self in no time. This is a big change, but dont get overwhelmed by the label of divorce, for you yourself know that the relationship was over long back. I am sure things will turn up now! yay! hugs :)

  2. You made it ME! You have come out of the hell. I know, its kind of hard to believe and takes time to sink in, but you have what you waited for so long. The bad days are ending soon. Pari and you are going to be just fine soon.

    You are the strongest person I have ever known and I am so happy for you ME. I am also so proud of you, for you managed to come out of it in one piece.

    My prayers and wishes you with ME, take your time to heal now. I know Pari will distract you and give you peace.

  3. Hey MyEra I am very very happy to hear this :) As you said the major is won and rest is only matter of time. Now you can concentrate on better things in life for both yourself and Pari :) All the best dear :)

  4. I know you just said you’re not feeling that happy but YAY. The court going in your favour is a big one. You sound like you need a holiday. Can’t you just take a week’s break and go somewhere cut off from the chaos to recharge?

    • I wish I could get a holiday right away, but there is still a lot of things to be cleared before I can get there :)
      The happiness and sense of relief is slowly setting in….so now I too am in a state to say, Yaaaaaaaaaay :D :D

  5. U mean to say that majorly the divorce is thruy? Thank God!! I am sure the nitigrties will take time and they will be painful as well but now you have your life ahead of you plan it the way you want. Take it as a plain canvas and color it my dear!

  6. Many many hugs dear ME… you have been so strong all along! I wish that with time may you discover newer joys, cheerful things to laugh about, opportunities for your personality to grow and shine, people who will respect and admire you for the wonderful person you are, several victories to celebrate and rejoice and so much more from life!

  7. Many hugs ME! Glad to know the proceedings are over. It will take time to adjust to the new way of life but am sure with Pari at your side you will find happiness :)

  8. Coming here after long time and this is indeed a good news for me. I am so happy for you and Pari. Tight hugs from me to you both..Take care and life is going to be much more beautiful..

  9. Hey ME! BIG BIG HUGS from my side-you’ve won a huge legal battle though mentally its going to take a lot of time for you to overcome all the sorrow and tough days you’ve faced. Though Im not able to comment on every post of yours, I’ve been reading and praying things sort out for you – I hope now things will atleast start looking better…

    All the Very Very Best to you and little Pari…

  10. Pingback: Reclaiming myself | The Era I lived in

  11. Congratulations and more power to you! Think of this day as an ultimate testament to your strength, grit and spirit. Celebrate it as the day the legal/judicial systems declared and established your right to your own life and happiness.

    So happy for you! :)

  12. I shall pray hard that you have a much muchh mucchh better life ahead..so that when you look back.. all you would say is.. everything happened for the best..

    Love & hugs!!

What's on your mind?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s